I've been here a little over two years and now it's not so much the case. Even though I've only (only?!) gained about 20-25 pounds since then, I'm just not as cute. I still dress up, but I haven't worn makeup on a day that wasn't my anniversary for years. I don't wear heels. I only wear skirts if I bothered to lotion that morning and the skirt doesn't cut of my stomach circulation.
I'm still one of the most-dressed up here (we're a fairly casual place), but I rarely feel like putting in the effort. I think that this stems from a number of things:
- No one else dresses up.
- Heels hurt my feet.
- It's often too flipping humid to wear makeup
- I wake up too late to dress nicely
I could spin this, of course:
- I'm more comfortable with myself.
- Have you seen/worn ballet flats?! Why wear anything else?
- I didn't wear makeup before I started this job, so why wear it now?
- I work and go to school and have a weekly internship. I need to be comfortable.
- So I look like a shlub now. You should see me in the winter. I'm super cute then because I can layer!
Of course, a lot of it comes down to one fact:
I don't care enough.
Every few months, I'll step it up and put on my favorite patent leather pumps (they're completely adorable) and a dress. I feel pretty when I do and tell myself it's time to stop letting myself go. Now that I've stopped letting myself go food- and exercise-wise, I am starting to wonder if I should do more in the way of my appearance. I wonder if I'd feel better about how I look right now. I know for sure that my skin is getting better, which is great, because my acne was terrible! I didn't have skin like this in high school!