My biological father and I do not have a good relationship. Well, to be honest, we don't have one at all--he and my mother divorced when I was eight and I haven't spoken to him in 15 years. I haven't considered him my "dad" for for 17. I have been fortunate enough to have a wonderful stepdad who is everything a dad could be. I absolutely adore him.
My father has been ill for a long time. He's something like a poster child for what can happen to you if you're overweight--diabetes, hypertension, high cholesterol, heart problems. I won't go into details, but today my sister called and told me about how his health problems have really progressed and what the prognosis is.
This isn't the forum for me to talk about my feelings about my father. I'll probably do some writing about it on my daily-life blog, but this one is dedicated solely to my weight loss efforts. In light of that, after talking to my sister, in addition to my angst, I was immediately grateful that I have made the decision to get healthy. A big part of my deciding to lose all of this weight stemmed from the fact that I don't want to end up like my father. I'm extremely fortunate to not have any health problems, but I'm not going to test fate by staying at this size to find out if I continue to not have any. I am glad that I have this that I have the opportunity to better my life, body, and health before it's too late. Now is the time to become the person I want to be.
Today at dinner I reluctantly broached the subject of exercising together with the hubs. I worry about his health as much as mine sometimes. I know that I have no right to tell him how to take care of his body, but I love him too much to not have said anything. I'm not going to bring it up again for a while. I have a lot of weight to lose, so I'm in no shape (literally!) to try to tell him to get healthier. But, I hope he comes to the conclusion himself soon. I love my Bear!
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7 comments:
Thanks for stopping by! It's so good to read everyone else's blog to get ideas, inspiration or just get a sanity check. I can't tell you how many times I said, "I thought it was just me." I'm looking forward to following your journey! Keep blogging!!
If you keep losing, the husband will join the band wagon, for sure! :-)
I struggle with this, too. I worry so much about my husband.
He knows he isn't healthy and sometimes he is motivated to do something, but most of the time not.
I think watching me to last two weeks has made a difference. He started counting calories yesterday.
Future good health is also the reason I'm on a similar journey. Today I heard the risk of a stroke is cut in half by walking 30 minutes a day. That's totally do-able. Now I just need to actually do it!
I'm proud of you for picking up some solid reinforcement of your new healthy choices out of such a hurt-filled and sensitive family situation. It can be so tricky to deal with such things with our families, because we see ourselves in them and vice versa. But you're absolutely right to look at him and be motivated to continue your changes and to be proud of yourself for doing so!
I'm sure your faithfulness is a quiet example to your hubby that could be more convincing than anything you /say/. And he IS ready to start following your footsteps (perhaps literally :), how lucky he will be to have you right there cheering him on!
Thank you for your comment on my blog! I really like yours too. It's very honest and raw, and I value that.
I saw in your list of books "Man's Search For Meaning"-- by Viktor Frankl? Because, if so, you are a rare and wonderous bird. I love that book so much, and I only know of one other person who knows what it is. :)
Thanks for all of your comments!
FG (I just WILL NOT call you by your blogger name!), I'm so glad your hubby is counting calories now. Kalem (my DH) is now really sensitive to how salty things are, so that's a start! I'm sure we'll be great examples for our spouses!
Naomi, I really do love that book! It's absolutely brilliant and really changed the way I live my life. I really appreciate the existential view of living. How cool that you love it, too!
Sharon, you're so right. I'm using this touchy subject to better myself. It may be too late to have a relationship, but I am grateful that he gave me the kick in the pants I needed to better my health.
I love this post...it was very powerful to me.
Keep it up! I have battled weight issues my entire life..you can do it!
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